Here’s why going slow is so important: It creates a sense of safety,
both from an emotional and physical standpoint. In order for the
tissues, muscles, s-sling and sphincters in the puborectal area to
relax and become aroused they need to feel safe. The faster and
more forceful you go the more your partner’s body is going to clench
down. Slow, careful movements will support a sense of safety for
him and set the stage for deeper levels of arousal.

How to Bottom Like a Porn Star: The Ultimate Guide to Gay Sex by Woody Miller